Everyone Should Apologize to Phil Savage

November 26, 2008

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Scott Ramage

Everyone Should Apologize to Phil Savage

Even hearing about it this long after it happened, I can't believe it was actually a story.  I'm referring of course to Phil Savage's e-mail to a fan that contained a profanity.  Note the word "a" so you can begin to realize just how stupid this story actually is.

Even better, what most reporters (coughESPNcough) are ignoring is that the fan Savage e-mailed was badgering him through the entire game against the Buffalo Bills.  You know you're hard up as a fan when you're insulting your team's general manager during a victory.  Afterward both the fan and Phil said they were embarrassed by what had happened, though honestly I think they're just embarrassed that deadspin.com put them on the spot.

Both apologized to each other afterward, and everyone has been sure to note that the NFL isn't going to sanction Savage over it.  Why would they?  If a GM can drive drunk, naked, through a fast food drive through and not get fired (until this season.  Hallelujah Detroit!), why should the NFL care about what was a private fan-to-staff conversation?   And besides, I hear stuff ten times worse than calling Phil "the worst GM in the NFL" just sitting in the stands at a Browns game, though I chalk that up to both beer and stupidity, neither of which hinder a fan's aim with a beer bottle.

If Phil's going to apologize for using a dirty word to a fan, and the fan apologized for being a moron, why shouldn't this have an apology domino effect?  Here's how it goes:

Phil apologizes to fan and Lerner

Fan and Winslow apologize to Phil

Lerner apologizes to fans and media

Media apologizes to Cleveland

Cleveland apologizes to fans

Fans apologize to Team

Team apologizes to itself

Edwards' hands apologize to Edwards

Edwards apologizes to 5-Hour Energy

5-Hour Energy apologizes to people that are awake late enough to see those ads

People that are awake late enough to see those ads apologize to the unemployment rate for not finding jobs

The unemployment rate and Marge Simpson's hair apologize to America for being too high

America apologizes to the Middle East for that whole war thing

Turkey apologizes to the World for that whole Turkish Star Wars thing

The World says "That's okay, Turkish Star Wars was hilarious."

 

BAM!  World peace because Phil Savage cursed at a fan.

Keywords: Phil Savage Cleveland Browns apologize

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